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When I started writing film reviews for The Nerd Report, I knew I’d have to make a decision; Do I pay premium movie ticket prices to see what’s so obviously complete garbage – all in the name of keeping the people up-to-date on the latest movie releases? Or do I forego the movie altogether in a “Fuck you!” statement to shitty movie-makers everywhere?
When I saw the first trailer for Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon I could feel the dread building up. Here was a movie that was directed by a guy I hate, starring an actor I can’t stand, about giant robots fighting each other. In my mind, there was no way this movie was going to be good – and surprisingly enough it was worse than I thought it would be! So for you, my reading audience, I chose the former and donated money to what I knew would be a terrible movie. God have mercy on my soul.
(Spoilers activated.)
Because He-Man was before my time I never got into the series. Thanks to 7Chan, that’s starting to change.
Click the image to see He-Man and his supporting cast sing to the ’90s hit ‘What’s Going On?’ by 4 Non-Blonds. It really is something special everyone should watch at least once.
If Super 8 felt a little familiar to you, that’s probably because it was. Written and directed by Lost‘s JJ Abrams, Super 8 is an obvious homage to those handful of films from the late ’70s-’80s that coined the term ‘summer blockbuster.’
After the jump, find out what worked and what didn’t in this sci-fi megahit.
Seven months ago I couldn’t contain my excitement when the first Green Lantern trailer was released. In two-and-a-half-minutes, the trailer gave audiences everywhere a taste of what to expect: there was your basic superhero origin story, casting was spot-on, and the visuals looked fantastic. I was literally antsy to see some of my favorite Green Lantern Corps characters brought to life on the big screen.
Starring a slew of talented (and somewhat lesser-known actors), and directed by Martin Campbell – credited for the rebirth of the James Bond franchise, I think a lot of people were hoping for the same magic that made Iron Man such a success. Both films featured a lead character that’s generally known for being a dick, both had casts that made fans go, “Wha-!?!” and both had iffy odds of being “blockbuster material.” Unfortunately, with a meandering plotline that took the audience through some confusing and sometimes boring scenes, all I can say is that Green Lantern is just okay.
(Spoilers below.)
At the end of April, Assorted Intricacies released a parody song of Like a G6 by Far East Movement. Titled Roll a D6, the song tells the story of a group of friends and the crazy shenanigans they encounter whilst playing Dungeons and Dragons. For anyone who’s never played the RPG, a D6 is your typical 6-sided die that is used frequently throughout D&D.
With lyrics like
In the basement rolling dice, I’m a wizard
When we play we think we fight giant lizards
Getting treasure piled high (piled high), Like the Rogue, Nyx
Steal a wallet from that guy? Roll a D6!
and
It’s that dungeon crawlin’ beast make you put your shields up
Make you put yo’ shields up, put yo’, put yo’ shields up!
I would say this song’s on par with Weird Al Yankovic‘s White and Nerdy, and hopefully will encourage other similar takes on traditionally bad pop music.
X-Men: First Class, featuring Magneto, Emma Frost, Angel, Mystique, Professor X, Banshee, Moira MacTaggert, Beast, Havok, and Nightcrawler's dad.
Today marks the worldwide release of X-Men: First Class. Helmed by director Matthew Vaughn (last known for his work on Kickass) and former X3 scribe, Simon Kinberg, the movie takes a stab at breathing new life into the franchise that launched a thousand comic book films. With a promising storyline and a solid cast featuring James McAvoy as Charles Xavier and Michael Fassbender as Erik Lensherr, I had hoped this would be the X-Men film I was waiting for.
I was dead wrong. (Psst! Spoilers on!)
Tron: Legacy hits the ground running, picking up soon after the original left off. Kevin Flynn (Jeff Bridges) is now CEO of Encom with a young son in tow named Sam (Garrett Hedlund). The two appear to share a tight bond, with the elder Flynn sharing the stories of his exploits with his son as bedtime stories. However, that bond is tested when K-Flynn goes missing after a night at the ‘office.’
Sam is then forced to grow up without a father, taking a path similar to Bruce Wayne from Batman Begins. He’s an adrenaline-junky with a devil-may-care attitude as well as a computer genius (because computer skills are hereditary?).
So anyways, through some way or another, Sam gets transported to The Grid – where the user is no longer a friend to programs. Sam gets captured immediately and does a lot of the same stuff his dad did in the original movie, i.e., the “games,” the motorcycle racing, stuff like that.
Sam also encounters various characters during his stay in the computer world, including Clue (digitally remastered HD Jeff Bridges), Quorra (Olivia Wilde), and ultimately his own father. Anyways, a bunch more shenanigans ensue… the end.
Tron: Legacy is very nice to look at, and the soundtrack fits really well with the feel of the movie, but does it offer audiences anything new to the Tron storyline? Sadly, no.
The original Tron was fun and different. The ideas presented in it may be dated by today’s standards, but that doesn’t take away the entertainment of the film. Legacy has all the looks of the original, but none of its charm.
Jeff Bridges was really Jeff Bridges-y too. The use of the word man… was almost too much to take.
We all know what happens when we inhale Helium. But what happens when we inhale something heavier than Oxygen?
As you can tell from the video, dense gas turns people into Patrick Starfish.
Director Irvin Kershner lost his three-and-a-half year fight with lung cancer at his Los Angeles home on Saturday. He was 87.
Kershner’s filmography spans 52 years directing anything from television documentaries to feature films. The director became best known for his work on Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980) after being personally chosen by George Lucas himself.
He will be greatly missed.
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